Adrian proposed in Scotland. He was being super sketchy and weird and I was frankly getting annoyed because I could tell something was off but couldn’t put my finger on it. He took me to my favourite seafood restaurant and after that we took a walk by the ocean. It wasn’t the best weather but it was such a beautiful moment. My make up was a mess from all the crying. He was really sweet and thoughtful because he knows how much I love the ocean.
Lobola was a daunting task for him and his family. They didn’t know anything about the process. He is an only child and has a very small family so his older cousin and best friend were his lobola squad. They were all very nervous
and it was sweet to witness them taking it so seriously and not questioning our culture and traditions. They watched a
ton of YouTube videos as well as read articles online. They took the effort to research what they needed to do and they
asked a ton of questions. Their research served them well.
The planning was difficult since the wedding was in the UK and I lived in the US. I have to give my husband full credit.
He planned everything from start to finish. I only assisted with choosing the cake when I was visiting him. He asked
a friend’s girlfriend to go food tasting with him. Again, Adrian was super thoughtful and we had a video call and
I gave some feedback. As for my bridesmaids – they didn’t have any dress fittings. They took their own measurements
(since Marcela lives in Chile and my other bridesmaids live in Boston). We just crossed our fingers that the dresses would fit. My dress makers were amazing. I had the best experience with both Antherline (bride dress) and Kwande from @luv_my_print (brides maids). My bridesmaids were adamant that they wanted to wear something from South Africa and they wanted to wear di tuku. Though I had very little involvement in the planning it was very stressful. However, my husband was very reassuring and put me at ease.
The venue helped us with most of our suppliers. For our photographer, we used Alba photography, who we found through a website run by my husband’s friend called Findr.me. The venue helped find us the videographers – Pure Moments. Both of them delivered beautiful results. I found my amazing make-up artist on Instagram and her name is Ama (Instagram name Amabeautye). We have a few bakeries in the area and we met with two until we made our decision to go with Bibis. Since I knew that I wanted to wear something from home and I was not local – I needed to schedule meetings with different dress makers ahead of time. It was very frustrating working with some suppliers from home.
They would not show up for meetings, not respond to text messages or they would be late, just downright unprofessional. I honestly didn’t have a good experience and perhaps my expectations were high nonetheless it was still very difficult. This helped me a lot because I know which suppliers I will never work with for the final wedding in South Africa.
So after all of that, I went back to Instagram and found some of my suppliers there. Mandisa from Kwande luv_my_print was just exceptional. The ladies from Ntozintle Accessories were just as exceptional. Matome from Antherline provided me with the best customer service and ultimately the best dress. He listened to what I wanted and brought my idea to life. All my suppliers from Scotland were great.
Life has changed – I have since moved from the US to the UK. Still in the process of making friends. I have changed jobs and I’ve been in the UK for 5 months now and I’m still trying to get my bearings. I no longer have a car since we live right in the city. Imagine that – no more car or car insurance! We walk everywhere and I love that. I love my new life and that I took my chance and trusted God. You don’t owe anyone anything but you owe yourself everything. Take a leap of faith and God will catch you if you fall. I am slowly starting to make friends. I met a few South Africans at church and we have gone out for brunch and lunch and that has been very refreshing.
LEBO’S WEDDING TIPS
I now understand why it takes about a year to plan a wedding. In a year I am going to have 3 weddings. I’ve found
it exhausting, even though I had lots of help. So kudos to all the ladies along with their partners and their squads.
Have a budget – Budget is one of the most important things ever.
Don’t let people tell you otherwise. Make sure your wedding is within your means and lifestyle. Remember that you and your husband have a life to live afterwards.